12 January 2015
Sheila's Retort to Bogan McShane
Rant Response to Human Resources - Empire Building and
Hidden Agenda Ninja's
Ping. Another email alert, whilst I am in a weekly HR meeting,
bored as hell and hoping someone will phone in a bomb threat. My
team is going on and on about recruitment and agencies. I glance at
my phone and see it is the monthly Stealth newsletter email. As I
am bored as bat sh*t I decide to glance and see what the Bogan has
to say for the month and by the title he certainly has my
Now the Bogan has raised some interesting points in his
rant and as a senior HR professional I believe it is the
right time for someone to give the Bogan a pineapple, and possibly
Point One - The Bogan is an experienced mining
professional who has earned credibility by actually working in the
industry and not just being a "bum on seat" recruiter looking for
their next commission. The Bogan can actually ask and understand
the technical questions and responses much better than I can.
Point Two - HR is a service provider. This is
how successful HR practitioners recognize and run their business
units. Partner with the business, provide a service and recognize
everyone is your customer, internally and externally.
The Bogan is a customer and even though many times I used to say
I was in meetings when he called - as I didn't want to talk to him
- he wasn't like other recruitment agents who sucked up my a*se for
business. He was someone who told me straight up that we were
paying too little to get a quality candidate or the company had a
bad reputation and only could hire the "Parmeshes" (dregs) of the
mining industry. In short, he's one of the good ones.
Let's face it: everyone has war stories about oxygen thieves
setting themselves up as recruitment agents during the good times.
After continual bad experiences of these morons, to whom for
convenience we will give the collective name of "Oliver", I
actually took off my HR hat and gave The Bogan a chance. Since then
I haven't looked back. Even when I have used the traditional HR
method and advertised externally, the Bogan was on hand to conduct
the "Muppet" check. (And as an added bonus, the mining downturn has
flushed a lot of Olivers out of the industry, and presumably they
are now asking customers "would you like fries with that?")
Point Three - the "Muppet" check. This is an
exclusive tool only available to the Bogan and it is invaluable.
The Bogan has this trick where you can call upon him to do an
informal "Muppet " check on a potential employee. I do not proclaim
to know how he does this but I think it may involve an IPhone and
touching his special place. The Bogan's Muppet List™ is the
place where all the Parmeshes of the mining world end up.
Point Four - Not all HR professionals are
"empire builders or hidden agenda ninja's" and to this I take great
offense. Unfortunately like unethical and unprofessional
recruitment agents, there are those in the HR realm who do seem to
think that because they are a senior leader and have some clout in
the executive space, that they are a 'protected' species and it is
these individuals who give good HR professionals a bad name and
reputation. They're the power-crazed gatekeeper types who give
everyone - both internal customers and external service providers -
the sh*ts. I don't run my team that way (see Point 2 above). HR is
not all things to all people and we are not here to fix all the
problems. Sure, we know how to develop a recruitment strategy,
budget and model but do we know how to recruit the right people
every time? No, we do not. HR needs to invest and establish
partnerships with credible Bogans.
So on this occasion I do agree in principal with the
Bogan but need to remind the Bogan that not all HR professionals
are "Human Remains" and treat us with the respect and courtesy we
do not show you.
Senior HR Professional
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