Bogan's Rant - With Michael McShane - February 2013

Cut the crap  - Give it to me straight

Have you ever looked at someone, not just a quick look, but a real, jaw open, no blinking, awkward eye contact look and thought 'Who the heck do you think you are, you elbow licking, Elvis impersonating, Clown worshipping, Galah!?'

Well I do. Often.

And I don't think I'm alone, despite you selling me out to stand in the middle of the firing squad by myself. And today I'm delivering my Bogan's Rant straight to their door.

Let me start with a pet hate - The Suit with issues

I don't know how many times we can cover this and how many times I can sigh into my cuppa at night as I'm proven right. Our friends, the recruiters who wear suits full of some deep seated heavy issues have struck again this month. Phone calls from confused candidates and frantic clients have been flowing in. People asking for our advice and our help to stop what in some cases could be construed as harassment.

I can't give you the specifics you crave, because, well I don't like lawyers any more than I like going to the dentist or the surgeon who will tear open my ankle this Friday. What I can do is light up the BBQ and share a yarn with some Macca, Bazza and John's thrown in as substitutes.

So Friday I get a phone call from Bazza. He's ticked off at a phone call from Tom asking which of the four recruitment companies that sent his resume forward he'd like to represent him. FOUR! He'd spoken to exactly one!

Then Shazza, who has been a client forever rings me in a tizzy saying 'Can you believe this clown!?!' Okay, that's not exactly what she said, but Shazza has a very descriptive vocabulary that would make Gary in Maintenance blush.

Shazza had an email from a very Special recruiter with the CV of John. Special knew that Shazza had no roles on for John, but he wanted Shazza to take John's CV anyway and 'Do what she wants with it' because he 'still had KPI's to meet' and John's CV seemed as good as anyone else's to send. Are you serious!?!

Needless to say she was less than impressed and I had to spend half an hour learning not to swear like Shazza again before I went home to the kids. Rugrats are sponges that learn too quickly.

Another pet hate? Coat hangers! The stupid things always get stuck on each other!! I've been told this isn't the forum for that discussion so we'll move on.

And just as you're starting to think I'm barking mad like on off leash unregistered dog we'll circle the ute back to a point. They call recruitment a self regulated industry. Guess what. I'm the self appointed Regulator and I will be encouraging you to pull your head in.

Rant out.

To all the people out there with heads as big as their sense of self importance 'Pull ya head in and join us in the real world!'